Ciphered Holos

"If I didn't know any better I'd think a Sith were standing in front of me."

Hurtful. But true?

Aran had left the moon shortly after the confrontation - meeting? - with Eron and Torlem. Arriving there had been a mistake in the first place, not shrouding her presence had been a mistake she was ill-equipped to rectify, and answering Torlem's fragmented Miralukese had been... perhaps the greatest mistake. The woman shook her head. Arriving any place was turning out to be a mistake though - either she lied to people she had once trusted or she frightened them or disappointed them. It was safer, more comfortable, in her studies. Pursuing whatever naggled her attention was more worthwhile. Ignoring the guilt she felt she should experience and was constantly surprised by the absence of.

She still ran the company of course. It still sent the slice of profits to Venrrir (her ally, openly admitted) per completed jobs. She now funneled half the profits into her own pocket though, keeping enough for base R 'n D for Sanguine and hiring (of course) but she was debating spinning that off to an attache. Someone who would give the company their full attention while she found hers wandering more and more to what she now considered her great works. Or at least her small

She could spend more time devoted to her studies, her curiosities. Her whims. She was discovering a capricious nature again instead of the slowly-adopted calm and once-steady nature she'd displayed as a Jedi even if that nature had quickly faded and been replaced with impulsiveness. Even now she was reserved for her current company, but she was certain that soon some long-denied pleasures would become commonplace again and they'd feel like well-deserved rewards instead of guilty pleasures.

Sinful memories came to mind as she ran a hand slowly through her hair, dragging and tugging on the strands. She licked her cracked lips and tasting the salt on them before she sighed, hand placed against the wall for balance."Would you enjoy the lifestyle, if you allowed yourself to?" It repeated in her thoughts as she felt like she was slipping ever so steadily back into the lifestyle.

But oh, the slide. The slide had been a slope, slippery and steep - but it'd been so easy, sinfully easy. It'd felt good, comfortable, and now that feeling was ingrained in her use of the Dark Side. Did that mean she was a Sith? She had begun playing the games again - she'd had no choice but to play them again, because she couldn't rely on her 'patrons' for protection.

Soon she'd need to find herself a way to remain free, before she found herself shackled to some lord's power base as an asset.

"You deserve to be more than a tool."

If she'd had eyes they'd be narrowed, teeth baring. She refused to be someone else's pawn. She refused to bow her head now, not when she'd finally begun to live for herself and her own desires.

She turned on her feet, footsteps clicking against the bare floor as she headed back to her studies room. She'd perfected her plague. Now to just practice - and to make sure it wouldn't turn against its creator.

And then somehow meet Torlem again, and try to convince him... of what?

She didn't know if she could play a game on the padawan.